life is hard.

okay so first day back on weight watchers. all was going pretty well until I decided to eat the rest of the food in my house. yup. had to get rid of it. so it was wine, pasta and garlic bread for dinner. um.... that would be a fail, but it was sooooo good. i also felt it necessary to top it all off with almond m&m's, which btw are the bomb. but sherry michelle was here and we had to celebrate our best friendness somehow.  besides it snowed today.

I have been trying to post the video of the mario batali recipe i used for like the last 15 minutes and i'm so angry that i can't do it and various curse words have been uttered. Millicent is also scare now, so too bad no video for stupid blog.

we are into bubbles

cutest thing ever

FINALLY

this was like a whole healing process for me, but i finally did it. and i would like to introduce you to nicki. she's been gone for awhile, but oh she's back now!

distractions

i've had an odd month. i'm not gonna go into it, but i've been trying to distract myself with projects like kickball league, which ends tomorrow. and crafts. wanna see a project?
exhibit a) boring filing cabinet

exhibit b) wallpaper

exhibit c) final result

yay! i think it really worked out. those filing cabinets were sooooo ugly. i feel better now.
also my nephew started preschool or pirate school house and he likes to call it. that kid.

HE'S SO BIG!

just one more day please!

i had a long weekend, which of course, flew by. but i started it off with a massage at the kura door. it's my new thing- spending $ on massages. it's really working out so far. and then california invasion of slc happened!
joymattrosieall came to visit! yay! hooray! i think the thing that impressed them the most about this city was all the amazing food we ate. so...without further ado- my menu for the weekend.

day one: LUNCH~red iguana where we ate various moles family style. two enchiladas stuffed with pork carnitas topped with mole amarillo, melted jack cheese and drizzled with crema mexicana. it's seriously one of the best dishes in town. they also had a mango mole special, which was diiiiivine! DINNER~ wild grape where i treated myself to their finest dish, potato gnocchi with braised beef, mushrooms, spinach and truffle oil.

day two: BREAKFAST: thanks complimentary hotel biscuits and gravy. and copious amounts of coffee. LUNCH: homemade picnic with caprese sandwiches, prosciutto wrapped cantaloupe, fresh cherries, and red quinoa salad made with cucumber, red onion and mint. DINNER: sapa which was amazeballs. let's break this down- starters: fire cracker calamari onions & peppers lightly battered w/ five spices, fried & served w/ chili & jalapeño sauce AND string beans wok seared w/ garlic, soy sauce & sake. entree: lemongrass vermicelli curry chicken YUM! here it is-also joy's meal was a big hit: filet mignon wok in French butter, fresh black pepper, luc lac sauce served with saffron coconut rice & stir-fried vegetablesday three: BRUNCH: pago. lovely, lovely pago with their cheap mimosas and the best damn coffee in town! check out this brie! it will change your world.and those are roasted grapes btw. henceforth all grapes shall be roasted! and my salad with summer peas and carrots and corn, oh my!with housemade ricotta, croutons and apricot dressing. phew. that was just the beginning, topped it off with the croque monsieur which is complete decadence. DINNER: eva's! i've been wanting to try this tapas place for some time and it did not disappoint. asparagus served with jalepeno aioli, crispy prosciutto, and a pouched egg. sauteed brussel sprouts with toasted hazelnuts and cider vinegar. flash fried calamari with sherry cayenne aioli, greens and sea salt. grilled scallops with garlic parsley butter and lots of local organic vegetable ragout. fig and pig which is the wood fired pizza with arugula pesto, fresh mozzarella, pancetta and figs. there was also house made sangria involved.

so as you can see, we were well fed. nothing better then good friends and good food!

flashbacks

guess what i did this weekend?
LOTS!
but one thing was that i went to see was Anton Checkov's Cherry Orchard at the Broadway.
so listen to this: the National Theater in London (tada!)
has partnered up with several universities all over the world, one of them being the Humanities Department at the University of Utah, to broadcast live productions from London. One of them was the Cherry Orchard. i shamefully realized that i have only been to one play in the past year (Angels in America) and that makes me so sad, cause i do love the theater. and i love the theater because of the National Theater in London- so i was very excited to attend this. it was wonderful and reminded me of one of the most incredible stage productions i've ever seen. Gorky's Summerfolk:i've just been thinking back to lovely london days. happy times. it was a great weekend.

very bon iver to you!

can i just post this and say nothing more?
kay

tripping trips

once there was a girl who lived in two places, she traveled between these places often, but mostly only in her head. of course there were advantages to this: never being fully present in the moment often meant less responsibility and certainly far less commitment. it also meant she was treated like an old friend just passing through, which had it's perks. then one year she decidedly chose one place over the other. this was exciting and also sad. so she went for visits. and she always felt at home no matter which place she was in. this felt confusing to her. "but where am i supposed to be?" she often wondered.

then she realized how lucky to feel at home in whatever place she was in. and how fortunate she was to have friends and family to welcome here wherever her return. and how nice to be missed. and finally understanding how being loved is actually home.

let's just stick to drugs please

this movie was terrible
i mean just terrible. i hated it so much. my therapist says i say hate a lot. but come one, with all the crap out there! sheesh. and it's not like i didn't know what i was getting into, i actually wanted to watch something brainless, but gah! so bad. it was basically an 80s movie. they were so good when you were 15, but now they make you want to gouge out your eyeballs.

i have to watch hours of parks and recreation now to make up for it.

SPRING?

i went on a lovely walk this morning. it's the first day we've actually had decent weather, so i walked up to the cemetery and took in the gorgeous view, that my old iphone just can't capture.
there is something so lovely about spring. i'm mostly an autumn kind of gal, but spring, i have to say, is not so shabby. except when it snows and it actually feels like winter. that sucks. on my way home i noticed that someone had written clever sayings at the engravings of the street names on the sidewalk. I started at about W and was pretty entertained my whole way home. this is my street. i like that someone put chalk to good use. it made me happy. that and the sun.

weekends are my favorite.

somebody might actually think i was a fairly positive person if they just read all my blogs that begin with my weekend time. this past weekend started with a lovely birthday celebration with one of the bffs. isn't she adorable? we were really disturbed by a gross, drunk couple making out [READ: sucking each other's faces off, with lots of vile licking] bff had a direct view of them the whole night. we felt real sorry for the other couple they were dining with. sucked to be all of us in the restaurant watching that. but all the free wine that the waiter gave us made up for it.
then my brother came into town and because i'm such an awesome host one of the first things we did was go to walmart! yay! and look what they had! i almost died of nostalgia overload. so of course i bought them and essentially ate the whole bag. hello this was my childhood.
in keeping with my job as an awesome hostess i next took scott to weinerschniztnel! let's be honest, that place may be a little scary, but a chili hot dog really hits the spot from time to time, n'est pas?
here's a super blurry picture of my adorable brother in what could only be considered the ghetto of slc.
but then i really was awesomeballs and took my brother to arcade fire!!!! it was in the worst venue ever in utah county, but know what? they still rocked it.
i realize these photos are worthless and that my iphone super blows, but it was free so whatevs!
so that was my super fun weekend. had a great time, totally went off my diet, but feeling good nevertheless. here's to good music, good company and booze.

black and white thinking is a thinking error

i recently finished reading howard zinn's A People's History of the United States: 1492 to Present and i have to say that it changed my entire frame of thinking in terms of american history. this is not to say that i was unaware that america has always been and still is about colonialism, imperialism and predatory capitalism (is that an oxymoron?) i know, but i didn't get it exactly. i finished the book a few days ago, it took me over a year to read it mostly because it's just so depressing. but it certainly got under my skin. just this morning i was driving to work thinking, this may sound contrite, but really this country went through a reformation in the 20th century that virtually shifted politics, trade, and social reform largely due to labor unions. it's impressive actually. on a somewhat related note, i sat down tonight to watch oliver stone's, South of the Border. it was essentially watching history repeat itself.

i'm glad he made this film.
i was a bit taken by evo morales of bolivia, especially when he said:
"i feel more like a union leader than a president." that just sort of summed it all up for me.

today was perfect

seriously. it was. some of you may know that i have decided it's time to shed a few pounds. today i weighed in and found out that my somewhat hard work has been paying off. i've lost 13 pounds and i feel real good about that. so i thought i would reward myself by buying tangled. i love to watch disney movies when i quilt, so this seemed like a glorious way to spend my day. allow me to give you a sneak peak of my latest quilt:
i'm pretty excited about it. i'm going to pay to have it quilted, that worked out well last time. and this with a bowl of popcorn thrills me to no end:
but then i finished sewing and i was like, you know? i do need some shoes that will be appropriate for trails. i think i'm going to do a little hiking in zion's in a couple weeks, so why not?
so then i was already at the rack, so i looked at watches, ya'll know how i've been trying to find a watch! well....it happened tonight.
and then...i just happened to be browsing the purses. i'm telling you it was crazy in there, so much goodness- burberry, rebecca minkoff and badgley mischika which naturally had to come home with me.
so we are happy and cozy at home together this blustery and rainy spring day.

doin my best

i'm real sad about japan. i decided to freak out and go off my diet and watch benjamin buttons to make me feel better. but then i forgot how sad benjamin buttons is. i was bawling. like sobbing, convulsing.
please forgive me for posting something with dane cook, but clearly he has his finger on the pulse of uncontrollable weeping.

hello!

got my new glasses! i love them so much. ready to be on call tonight and throw them on so that i look smarter.

not to love, just to dream

i had to bust out bonnie rait this morning.
i have been having crazy vivid dreams lately, which is so nice because it's been such a long time since i've had nice dreams or dreams that aren't full of angst, anxiety and hurt feelings. like i'm having dreams. it's truly a gift to be able to just close your eyes and have random nice things happen: elementary crushes resurfacing, bff time, vacationing in nordic tropical islands, flirting. all good times. and this song, although a bit sad is just dreamy....

okay button

again there is no such thing. but i'm feeling lots better and more in control so i thought i would celebrate with adorable critters.
prepare yourself:

is it a hedgehog? i do not know and i do not care because it is adorable.

and that cat pic is just so stoopid that it's also amazing.
and now for the big guns:

did you die? because i want that doggy so bad. first of all what kind of leetle precious baby dog is it? and then why was someone so clever to give it a mohawk and then dye it red? clearly, because someone is brilliant.
let's go get em last week of february!

reset botton.

do those even exist? where did i get that from? there's no reset button on my computer. reboot.restart. retard. dunno.
anyway this weekend was supposed to be for that, so i can get a handle, cause i certainly felt like i lost it. or am still. dunno again.
so friday was this:

saturday i cleaned and such, which felt really good. went shopping and made myself a lovely salmon dinner. it just felt good to eat a home cooked meal, since it's been like a month (excluding my fabulous dinner at al's superbowl party). but i also went shopping for frames and i found some:

the ones i want are black frame with a square bit of red in the corner. so cute. so pricey. so mine. someday.

today i met up with friends.
took a long walk.
stopped and talked to some guy named noel (pronounced like no-el as in christmas- how charming!) he was playing banjo in his front yard. asked him to play me a song which he obligingly did. which also reminded me that next year for halloween i want to be steve martin


the best part kittens, is this day is not over yet.

someone needs a chill pill

started the new job.

still hate oatmeal even if you try and disguise it in cookies. that's not cool by the way.
also am confused that there are flies in my house. hello? it's freezing and you should be dead and how the hell did you get in here anyway? there are no open windows or doors. kind of creeps me out. a lot.
i'll end on a happy note:

that's my bff gaga, she's coming over in march to hang.

i feel weird

maybe it was the six cups of coffee.
maybe cause it's my last day of work tomorrow.
maybe cause i had a strange date.
maybe cause i forgot to eat lunch.

when i say weird i mean i sort of feel confused and tired also a little buzzy and i think maybe a little anger too?

just weird. perhaps i need to start a garden.

insomnia

okay i think i know why i've been having so much insomnia lately. besides the fact that i'm incredibly stressed: my left eye has been twitching for 3 days, acquired a lovely cold sore on my lip, had exactly one migraine and several baby headaches. yes, besides that.

this stuff

i know i'm a little late to the game, but i love this lady

she's a badass

and i sped right through the second one

and now for the third

they are pretty disturbing, but so addicting. so awesome.

comfort food and such

my electric blanket. i love it. i think it gave me a 2nd degree burn on my arm, but i still love it.

turkey kielbasa. it's just delicious.

skins- uk version (haven't seen mtv's version yet) it's like a naughty dawson's creek and i adore it.

my blue sweat pants. i wish i could wear you to work. it's the first thing i do when i get home. put on blue sweat pants- no need to ever wash them.

pooh bear- my sister got him for me at disneyland some many years ago.

friend's who return calls- i feel strangely lucky and slightly vulnerable when you call back. thanks.

today one of my clients in group said, i don't like it when people say they love me. i want to tell them to stop. they don't know. they don't know what i've done. i felt so sad for her. and i think i felt so sad because she really touched a chord. hate it when clients do that. so tonight i had a combo platter of blue sweat pants, electric blanket, skins, pooh and the always delightful turkey kielbasa. it helped.

good night.