because my sister asked me too...then threatened me, which is scarey because she is 8 months pregnant

4 Movies I would watch more then once


1.) Singin' in the Rain
2.) Funny Face
3.) The Hours
4.) Pulp Fiction



4 Jobs I have had

1.) Child Protective Services, State of Utah
2.) Fox TV- Production coordinator
3.) Grocery store cashier
4.) Substance Abuse counselor

4 Places I have lived

1.) Salt Lake City, Utah
2.) Scottsdale, Arizona
3.) Los Angeles, California
4.) Tallinn, Estonia

4 Places I have been to/visited

1.) London
2.) Paris
3.) Lithuania
4.) Latvia

4 Favorite Foods

1.) Mexican
2.) rice! rice! rice!
3.) cheese & crackers
4.) salty meats :)

4 Places I would like to Visit

1.) London- over and over again
2.) St. Petersburg
3.) Tokyo
4.) Amsterdam

4 Things I am looking Forward to

1.) Baby Carl
2.) Graduating
3.) Someday having my own kitchen
4.) Love

4 Friends I am Tagging

1.) Allison Anderson
2.) then end
3.) because other blogger
4.) friends will not do it - thanks Al!

i love orca butts!

my ladies

roses

I love roses. I really, really do. Last week I worked a wedding and they didn't want to take home their flowers. They had gobs and gobs of roses- I took home three bouquets, probably about 4 dozen roses! They are purple and pink and still going strong. I moved into my new place and it's been really nice to have it smell like fresh roses.

I have said the word roses a lot- too much in this blog

rosesrosesrosesrosesrosesrosesrosesrosesrosesrosesrosesrosesrosesrosesrosesrosesrosesroses

McDonald's, Valium...anyone?

This week I have:

found a full time job
quit two jobs
found a place to live
ate fast food twice in one day
skipped class
did some homework
laughed
took some xanax
caught up with old friends
drove a golf cart for 6 hours straight
watched mary poppins
wrote a blog

so it's been a busy week, up and down and all around. There was some crying and some laughter. I'm tired and apprehensive about the coming week, so I may have to eat three square meals of fast food- to keep up the stamina, aw...the old stamina.

good luck

It has been a strange couple of days. I was approved for my student loans and found an apartment, then was denied my loans and am trying to break my lease without losing my deposit and first months rent. I went to a cabin with some friends to relax (much better then the tent) then came home and had a disturbing conversation about "dating other people". Felt a bit lonely so went online to view some personals- one creepy guy wrote back and another said, "good luck." Good luck? Well allow me to say a little something about luck. It's bullshit. There is no such thing as luck is there? You plan as much as you can, you're careful and then things still don't work out. OR you throw life to the wind and fly and guess what? Same thing, things still don't work out. So what is there to do? You just hold onto your values, live by them try to have integrity and keep your wits about you. This is much harder to do then one would think. So what is luck? It is something you say to make others feel better or it is something we tell ourselves when on the off chance something goes our way and we just can't explain and/or believe it. So...yes, good luck to me.

Seriously...Camping? It isn't fun.

I went camping. I know, I know. She who hates camping. I started getting this whole romantic notion of what camping was actually all about. I kept thinking, aw...the stars and the fire, roasting marshmallows, hikes by shallow streams, that just sounds real nice. Then I remembered. Camping sucks. It's super cold at night and you have to wear too many layers and then cram yourself into a sleeping bag and it's hard not to feel like you are getting into a body bag. Then it's really too warm during the day and you get sunburned and there is nowhere for you to go to get away from being hot cause you are OUTSIDE. Then the poop and the pee and the throw up. I did not throw up this trip, but almost. Actually I feel pretty good about this. I never really felt like I mastered a good squatting technique, well no more! All was well in that department. The first night, as I was breathing through fits of claustrophobia, I thought to myself: seriously, never again. Then that morning it was all stormy and I decided to stay in the tent, nothing to do anyway- I slept until 1:00 pm! I never do that! It was that really deep wonderful sleep where you are totally unconscious and whenever you try and get up it feels like someone is pushing you down and saying, shh, shh just sleep, just sleep. So I did. Then I felt much better about camping.

You know most of my camping experiences have been with my family. I sort of erroneously equated all of my bad camping stuff with my father, since he always loved camping and made us go. On this trip I found I realized some things about my dad a) he is extremely efficient and fast to set up and break down camp b) he makes the best camping breakfast c) he always has cool, up to date camping stuff and d) he taught me everything I know about camping i.e. trash and waste disposal, how to set up a tent, how to pack, how to hike. I remember before I went on my mission he bought me this fleece sleeping bag blanket. I slept in it my whole mission. I lost it in one of my 6 or 7 moves and have missed it very much- it would have been nice to have it on this trip. My dad is a man who loves to camp and shared that with his children. He did a good job.

but...I still would rather be in a resort.

not for you, for me

just wanted to write some muses, comment on the day and recognize some of the things in my life that both put me to bed and then get me out of bed.

today i started summer school
today i ate sushi
today i looked for places to live
today i had cramps
it was a good day.